How Kids Wish Their Parents Would Behave in the Stands

This is a tremendous video of young athletes talking about their parent’s behavior in the stands. They also talk about how this behavior affects them while playing. Finally, they ask the child how they wish their parents would act in the stands. The comments from these young athletes are eye-opening.

Joe’s Perspective: The overwhelming feedback from these kids is chill out, tamp it down, let me play my own game. Over-coaching or yelling from the stands makes the players anxious, embarrassed and/or stressed. The message to parents seems to be, just show up, be my parent and smile.  As a parent, this is an important message to hear. However, I wonder how many parents are receiving this message.

Your Turn: If you had advice for your parents in the stands, what would it be?

Comments 39

  1. I think encouragement is very important, but I think you should say things after the match to make sure that I can focus on the match.

  2. You can be excited just don’t overdue it, if you don’t know what’s going on don’t just yell it catches my focus during my matches.

  3. My advice would be to leave the coaching to the coaches and the screaming needs to be kept down. I say this because I don’t think the parents know how it effects their kid and other when they are playing or on the side lines

  4. I would tell them that we know what we’re doing and there’s no need to get all wild and that they should leave the coaching to the coaches.

  5. I would tell them that we know what we’re doing and there’s no need to get all wild and that they should let the coaches do their job.

  6. Well to me I think that if your not a coach or dong have any coaching experiences or not involved in any teaching methods I would just suggest leave all of your child’s skills or lack of skills that need progress to the teacher or coach and when your cheering I would say to keep it positive and not too disturbing to other parents.

  7. Well to me I think that if your not a coach or don’t have any coaching experiences or not involved in any teaching methods I would suggest leaving it to the actual coaches themself because that may cause some children to be confused because they won’t know who to listen to.

  8. My advice would be for the parents to know that them yelling or scream doesn’t make the athlete a better player it actually makes me get in my head a lot and mess up more

  9. Advice for my mom and her boyfriend in the stands would be to maybe just cheer and not so much of just yelling out of no where, move your feet, or cmon!! because that would just make me feel embarrassed or maybe even stressed because i can’t focus on what i need to really do in a game that coach keeps telling me over and over again to do in practice.

  10. My advice to my parents is that they may cheer often, just make sure not to go over the top, because it makes me anxious and a little bit embarrassed.

  11. Just don’t get mad when people make a mistake or even at me we are slowly adjusting and learning by times goes by.

  12. i would say to just watch the game and that the coaches know what their doing and if i’m not doing the greatest, don’t tell me how to do better, that’s the coaches job.

  13. for me, i would enjoy cheering and signs of enjoyment. however, i don’t want any signs of disappointment or annoyance especially at teenagers because it’s condescending and inappropriate behavior especially from a parent.

  14. Yelling at an athlete does not better the situation , let the coaches do their job , we aren’t making mistakes on purpose!

  15. For me I don’t mind them cheering me on while I play, but when they yell and try to coach from the sidelines it makes me anxious and tends to get me even more frustrated and in my own head

  16. My parents are pretty good about their behavior in the stands, but they do get mad at the refs sometimes. So I would want them to just relax more and let the coaches get everything solved.

  17. To equally cheer for every player on the court. To keep positive and not yell negative comments at the players. We know what we need to fix!

  18. to stay calm and don’t get upset or start yelling or anything when someone messes up and that we know what to do and they don’t need to tell us

  19. I love the support and encouragement but I don’t think i would ever need another coach when I’m on and off of the court some times.

  20. I would tell them that what ever they see is me trying my best and it’s embarrassing when you are screaming at me from across the court.

  21. I would tell them that we know what we’re supposed to be doing and that we will be listening to our coaches instead of them.

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